Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Waking Up Married


by Mira Lyn Kelly
Rating: 2 of 5 stars

My Review:
This is my first foray into the Harlequin KISS line. I think I saw this book when it first came out, but I didn't buy it right away. I wasn't sure what to expect with this new line of books, but the premise of this one sounded like fun. In fact, I just read another book that starts out similarly – couple meets in Vegas, gets married and then has to deal with the fall out. The cover of this one looked like a nice romantic comedy-type, so why not. But I just couldn't get into it. It felt slow and heavy, like a bad muffin. You keep hoping it turns around, but it just kept dragging.

First up is our heroine, Megan. She's got some guy problems. Seemingly guys just don't stay around with her. She's really nice, looks like a on-track sort of person, but decides that she just doesn't want to deal with the whole romance thing anymore. She just wants to have a baby. I can applaud her for her straightforwardness and her internal decision-making process. She's figured out what she wants and she's going for it.

But as we move through the book, we see that she actually has a lot of daddy issues, boundary issues and she really can't enjoy the beginning stage of a relationship because she's so scared that the guy is going to leave her. With her underlying issues, I'm surprised she was able to have a couple relationships before this one and that she was able to get to the point where the guy left her. It felt to me like she doesn't let herself have that honeymoon period in a relationship. She wants all or nothing – 25 years married couple or single matron. She just can't handle the in between. I could understand the fearful place that was coming from, but she sure takes it to the extreme. If that were the only thing, she'd still seem pretty likable, but then she's got the boundary issues.

Megan's only interaction with anyone not related to her new husband is her cousin and the cousin's two other bridesmaids. (The cousin's wedding is the reason they started out in Vegas.) This trio is a pile of work. They're just nasty to Megan. I didn't mind it too much at the beginning of the book because they were there for the wedding. Megan says she doesn't know them well but keeps the peace for the sake of the wedding. I can respect that, but then when things are going bad for her, she calls these same women. And sits meekly while they ridicule her and have their little cliquey, nastiness to each other about Megan while they're talking. Megan gave me no indication that she had friends or any form of life outside what other people chose to bestow on her. Whether it was Connor or these non-friends, she thinks she's a steady, decisive person because she was going to choose artificial insemination, but every single part of her life that we see in this book shows her unable to care for herself physically or emotionally. She gave one small shove of independence late in the book, but that was it.

Then we have Connor. Typical Harlequin billionaire-type. Used to getting what he wants but he has a troubled past with a broken home growing up. He seemed very strong, arrogant, and unflappable, but often strayed into the douchy category to me.

Connor starts out talking with his friend at a Vegas bar and you can just see him rolling his eyes as his friend asks if he's dating. He starts narrating to himself that his guy friend loses his man-card because he's talking about feelings. And these were simple questions like “how are you holding up since your almost-fiancee dumped you?”. Strike one for the douchy-hero.

He doesn't want a love relationship because that's just too messy. But he does want a companion-wife with benefits. He gives a lot of mixed signals with stuff like wanting Megan to “fall for him” (his words), but really, this is just a happy companionship. He's jealous and possessive of Megan almost from the start, which seems to be Harlequin-speak for “I'm falling in love and I don't even know it”. I can handle a little bit of jealousy or possessiveness, but it starts straying into “ownership” in this book. He's known Megan for one day and when she gets dressed up for her cousin's wedding, he just can't handle that other people will see some of her thighs or the shape of her butt and goes so far as to try to cover her up with his coat as soon as he can. Strike two for the douchy-hero.

They decide to give the marriage a try, so Megan (obviously) moves part-way across the country to live with Connor. Megan ends up testing Connor with all her worst flaws to see if he can handle who she is. Connor catches on to what she's doing and doesn't really care one way or the other. He'll deal with bad food, facial scrub masks, pajama days when Megan's working all day, just as long as she stays with him. It's meant to be sweet and vulnerable for both of them, but when Connor's internal monologue says he can touch her butt because “he needed a reminder as to why he was going to choke down the coming atrocity. An incentive of sorts.”, it veers into objectification instead of caring. Strike three for the douchy-hero.

I liked Connor's friend, Jeff. I almost wish he was the hero instead. It would have served Connor right to lose Megan to Jeff for being such a douche. But then again, Megan didn't show a lot of promise or backbone, so I probably wouldn't want to stick Jeff with her anyway. Jeff showed himself to really care about Connor, even though Connor really gave him no reason. He kept Connor in line even when Connor was a jerk and the times that Jeff makes an appearance in the book are more lighthearted.

The ending was satisfyingly emotional. Megan grew some backbone related to Connor (but not to her “friends”), Connor groveled in a nice way, and I was glad to see them together. But the journey to get there didn't feel worth it. Neither character seemed to grow personally, even if they did resolve some of their afraid-of-love issues.

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